Despair Happens

Photo by Shaian Ramesht

“We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about the troubles we experienced in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself” (2 Corinthians 1:8).

Paul is easily one of the most transparent Christians I have ever encountered. From what I can tell by his letters, it never seemed to occur to him that people of faith shouldn’t express any negativity in life.

Much like Paul, Jesus seemingly felt no inhibitions about sharing negative thoughts. Shortly before his arrest and crucifixion, he said to his disciples, “my soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death” (Matthew 26:38).

Contemporary psychological research affirms the importance of articulating feelings of sorrow and despair. Accepting negative emotions is crucial for mental health and attempts to suppress or ignore them can cause psychological harm (Rodriguez, Scientific American, 2013).

So why do many Christians still believe that Christian faith is irreconcilable with acknowledging negativity?

One reason might be a misunderstanding of the very concept of “faith.” In the Bible, “faith” is not foremost a disposition or state of mind that a person possesses, but something that a person does, as s/he lives a life pleasing to the Creator who desires what is best for creation. Such a commitment has much more to do with acting justly and righteously in the world and far less with demonstrating a triumphal attitude.

Nevertheless, it might be asked: doesn’t a committed relationship with God necessarily entail a belief that God always has our good in mind (see Jeremiah 29:11)? And, if that is the case, shouldn’t we do everything in our power to put away negative thoughts since God is ultimately in control (see Philippians 4:4–9)?

Not always. While God does indeed have our good in mind, the overarching biblical witness rejects a passive resignation to circumstances as merely representing God’s will for our lives.

A simple perusal through the book of Psalms will reveal that over one-third of them represent complaints to God (see especially Psalm 88). Similarly, the book of Job presents this character’s elaborate protest towards God for his undeserved suffering, and the book concludes with God declaring that Job spoke rightly (Job 42:7).

There are texts in the Bible that emphasize God’s providence (see, for example, Genesis 50:19–20; and Proverbs 16:3–4, 7, 9, 33; 20:24; 21:1). Yet no such passage suggests in any case that a person should emotionally detach themselves from adversity.  

While not the cause lying behind everything that happens, God does work in and through our circumstances (see Romans 8:28). His abiding presence and activity on our behalf are certainly a source of hope and a basis for trust. But our final hope and trust in God still allows room for moments of sorrow and despair.

Negative thoughts, as experienced by Jesus and Paul, are a normal human response to difficulty and trouble. If we truly trust God, then it follows that we should hide nothing from him. Processing our emotions in a responsible fashion can only happen if we first acknowledge them. And because God is good, we can rest assured that he is always ready to listen. Are you?